TJ's Ramblings at 1:00 AM

It is now 1:00 AM on Thursday. I sit in a waiting room with 2 other families. It is dark and rainey outside. I look over the lights of the city. A good friend has just left and I am alone to ponder--and be grateful for all that is going on, and for all of my blessings.

My thoughts have gone everywhere in the last 18 hours, and the last 2 years. This journey has been a roller coaster but God has given me a peace that passes understanding. I truly rest in His arms knowing that He loves Belinda more than I can imagine and that He wants the very best for her. I have faith that He will care for her and restore her.

I grieve for the donor family. Someday I hope they realize the impact of the gift they have given to Belinda. Someday I hope we can say thank you to them. I pray that they too will feel the peace of Christ on this journey. I trust God will soften the sting of death as they mourn their loss.

I look over the city, into the darkness, and am reminded of the darkness in our world. Like others in this waiting room, and the city, we deal with crisis points in our lives not knowing what the outcome may be. Some days can look very dark. I have sat here and reflected on this city and prayed for healing for it's residents. I recognize that we don't always have the priveledge of knowing the answers, but I pray there will be peace for everyone. 

I am reminded of a Man who knew the outcom of His journey, knew the pain He was to endure, and still was faithful to carry on. He was willing to give up His freedom so that others could live. His sacrifice provided hope.

In this journey, like all of our journeys, the pain of death must be experienced to recieve life, true life. I am thankful for the one who paid the price so we can have life--and have it abundantly! Tonight I mourn--and I celebrate. To some this will sound odd. Some day I hope all will understand. I am truly blessed!